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Dear Santa
Offline OldSpritz

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#1
Dear Santa

Dear Santa,

Fifty sixth delivery for you. Crap, maybe I should be in that sliegh. Nah, I like my plane better than those smelly reindeer. We have had our history to say the least. Remember those early years my addresses kept changing and sometimes you were almost out of presents before you got there? No problem you made up for it later.

I remember when I turned six and started putting out cookies and milk for you and a can of dog food for Rudolph. As I got older started leaving you my letter under the cookie plate. Finally learned about the Post office. What a leap in technology that was. Then those relatives got sick and passed on and we kinda got crossed. Took me awhile before I started writing you again. But hey, I was just a kid.

Remember when I was thirteen and slipped that Playboy under the tree for you. Why didn’t you take it? You could have tossed it before you got home! Crap, I got a woopen for that!! Damn Marine! You never did tell me how you liked my special brownies I left you for those five years. All I know is after opening presents I had to go outside and pick up shingles and bricks from the chimney. I don’t know what that was about.

Hey, remember that special tea one year? Holy crap, that neighbor across the street was really mad about his new Caddy getting pushed through the garage door. That old man in his freaking red boxer shorts and his wife's pink fluffy slippers flying out the front door was priceless!!

Oh well, the good old days. Hope you still aren't mad at me. After all, its been twenty years since it happened. You know I would never do anything to you on purpose. All those cookies and “Special” snacks I left for you over the years and some of my best “literature” all out of love! I had no idea when it started. I was having a drink with a friend and snacking on some chips and there she was. One thing lead to another and the next thing I knew I woke up next to a Christmas tree and two height challenged individuals with my clothes in their hands waiting for me to leave. WTF!

Then I began to remember the night before. Drinks, eats, walk on the beach (Texas) and a roll in the hay. Then she stepped into the room asking me if I wanted some candy corns with syrup for breakfast. Wow, she was Hot! I began to smile...then, I looked outside and saw the reindeer in the backyard. Crap, no way... I looked down at the two small peeps and saw the pointed shoes and then I knew. I know their were a lot of clues. The little elf tattoo on her thigh, the pierced jingle bells in her ears and her rosie red cheeks…..you decide. She only told me who she was afterwards…I swear!!

All in all been a real pain in the butt year. Confusion, greed and a whole lot of d..bags running the world. But, like you have shown me, never give up Hope. At first I thought you meant your daughter, LOL... And so I keep up the Hope. Don’t know how, but I can feel great changes in the air.

Thanks for the new friends I have met in SmG and in H2V. Some of them remind me a lot of me... OMG. Lock your daughter up and don’t eat any of their snacks. And whatever you do never allow her to visit Australia. There’s more than just kangaroos going up and down there!

Those houses that smell like hemp, drop a little extra stuff to them . To those who have left the clan and have a few issues with the leadership take it easy on them. Special gifts for the founders and those involved with keeping the equipment up and running.

Prodigy, Anarchy, Diesector and some of the original members a special gift, I will let you choose. Your pretty good at that. All in all just move them all closer to who they really are and away from who they think they are.

To my friends, I leave you with this paraphrased song…

This Christmas season, I wish you joy
The wonder in every girl and boy
I wish you gladness, the warmth and cheer
Of good friends and family gathered near
May children’s laughter and falling snow
Rekindle sweet scenes from long ago
May every carol, each candle bright
Remind you why angels sang that night
If trouble finds you, this is my prayer
May peace guard your heart and make you strong
And I wish you love, the kind to last all year long.
May your days be merry, your sorrows be small
May the ones you love be near you
That's the happiest Christmas of all

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year ....

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22 Dec 2011, 06:03 AM
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Offline «SmG» Cloud

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#2
Re: Dear Santa

A funny, beautiful, and entertaining post. Great post oldspritz. lol special brownies.
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22 Dec 2011, 06:16 AM
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Offline Noble

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#3
Re: Dear Santa

Reminds me when I was a little younger...really nice Spiritz.
22 Dec 2011, 06:26 AM
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Offline SmG XLORM

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#4
Re: Dear Santa

lol the playboy...
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22 Dec 2011, 06:34 AM
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Offline «SmG» Cloud

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#5
Re: Dear Santa

SmG XLORM Wrote:lol the playboy...

:lol:
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22 Dec 2011, 07:07 AM
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Offline SmG Nukem

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#6
Re: Dear Santa

That's where my playboy went :fies:
Don't piss off old people.
The older we get the less "life in prison" is a deterrent.
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22 Dec 2011, 07:35 AM
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Offline Cookie

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#7
Re: Dear Santa

No women this time? I think you may be getting soft, my friend... or is that me?
Please give generously.
22 Dec 2011, 07:44 AM
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Offline Omega

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#8
Re: Dear Santa

thx for acknowledging me spiritz :D :D
22 Dec 2011, 11:30 AM
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Offline SmG Battlefire

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#9
Re: Dear Santa

Oldspitz we are like children around the fire and you telling us a grampa story. That was a geat post my old firend.
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22 Dec 2011, 01:48 PM
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Offline marshMello

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#10
Re: Dear Santa

Hahaha, that was pretty good OldSpritz. Made my day...after everything that happened.
Merry christmas :D
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22 Dec 2011, 07:28 PM
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