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Like you said, RM is more taxing then mod as it requires a "desktop". You did mention that you held onto to the position as you wanted to be promoted to mod. However seen from another persepctive caused others to think that you didnt do/like your job as nobody knew ur true intentions; hence you developed a "negative impression" of urself.
i7-5820k @ 4.7 ghz, Asus X99 sabertooth TUF, Kingston DDR4-3200 16 GB
Corsair H110i GT AIO, Samsung 850 Evo 250 GB x 2, EVGA GTX 1080 Ti SC2 Hybrid
Asus ROG Swift PG279Q 1440p/165hz, Corsair AX760w, Corsair Obsidian 750D