[SmG LittleBeta]

Seems like nobody has actually answered anything so I will put my thoughts into play. I understadnd that feeling of "missing something" when it comes to depression. I experienced a deep depression and apathy later on for about 4 years. I used to live with my birth mom and her negativity on the constant added to the loneliness and negativity I was already fighting within myself. I did take the time throughout all of that to examine myself and think deep into the root cause. It took me a while but I came up with what best fit and it helped clarify some things for me which lessened the effects. Its like once you are aware of it you can fight against it so much easier. I won't go into detail about my root bc its very personal and i'm still new around here.

That something you're missing tho is what you need to seek. Think for yourself on your past and your own issues you experience now. If you can become self aware of your own problems it also helps bc then you can understand when its you telling yourself lies in your own thoughts or if its logical thought. It could be a mix of differing aspects that cause that emptiness you feel but the only one that can piece it together is you bc you know your own life the most. To put it simply become your own "psychologist" so to speak and ask yourself the hard questions in order to better understand yourself. That was the key to it for me.

And know this, you aren't alone and you aren't the only one that has experienced this kind of thing. I think its wonderful that you're aware of figuring this out tho. Not a lot of ppl have it in them to confront themselves or their problems they deal with on the daily. It's so much easier to just not care about it or pretend but that isn't the answer and neither is sitting in your own negatative stagnant puddle. If you need someone to think outside the box with i'm always available.